As an Ambassador, you’ll likely encounter challenging conversations. This is because meningitis is a deeply emotional and sensitive topic, and some of the people you meet may have a very personal connection to it like you do. It’s crucial that you’re prepared to approach these discussions with empathy and care, and that you also prioritise your own well-being.
To help you manage these difficult conversations and look after yourself during and after them, our Support Services Manager, Caroline, has put together some essential tips.
Why might people be emotional during conversations?
People may become emotional when discussing meningitis for several reasons:
Raw experiences: They might still be grappling with a traumatic, life-changing experience related to meningitis, either personally or through a loved one.
Bereavement: They may have lost someone to meningitis.
Safe space: They might feel comfortable opening up to you as a representative of Meningitis Research Foundation, seeing it as a safe and understanding environment.
Expectation of understanding: They may believe you’ll understand their experience and feel comfortable sharing openly and emotionally.
Complex emotions: They could be experiencing a mixture of emotions, including grief, anger, loss, frustration, depression, or anxiety.
Why this can be difficult for you
Emotionally charged conversations are tough to handle for anyone. As an Ambassador, this topic can be particularly impactful:
Personal impact: You might find yourself getting emotional as well after everything you’ve been through.
Suddenness: Challenging conversations can happen unexpectedly, catching you off guard.
Lingering thoughts: You might dwell on what you could have said differently, worry about the person, or feel like you couldn’t help them enough.
Fear of upsetting them: You might worry about making someone more upset or not being able to give them what they need.
Please remember – it is not your role to be a therapist or counsellor for someone else. If you think someone needs further support, you can recommend they speak to our Support Services team. If you are worried about them, please contact our safeguarding lead.
Top tips
Body language
Over 55% of our communication is non-verbal, making body language incredibly important.
The good
Relaxed posture: Maintain an open and relaxed stance.
Open gestures: Avoid crossing your arms or curling inward, as this can make you appear uncomfortable or closed off.
Eye contact: Mirror the level of eye contact the person offers. If they avoid eye contact, don’t force it. If they look at you, try to meet their gaze gently.
Affirmative movements: Subtle nods and gentle smiles can show you’re actively listening.
Slow and steady: Make your movements deliberate and unhurried.
The bad
Don’t check the time: This signals a desire to end the conversation.
Avoid looking at the ground: It can make you seem disengaged.
No fidgeting: Resist tapping or other distracting behaviours.
Mind your distance: Find a comfortable distance that feels appropriate for both you and the other person – not too close, not too far.
Verbal communication
Don’t push for details on personal or sensitive information: Allow the person to share only what they feel comfortable with.
Avoid jargon: Steer clear of medical terminology or complex jargon, even if it’s familiar to you. Keep your language clear and accessible to prevent confusion.
Slow down: Most of us speak faster than we realise. Slowing your pace gives you time to think and allows the other person to process what you’ve said.
Allow pauses: Let the person take their time. They may need moments to think or reflect during the conversation. Don’t feel the need to fill every silence.
Acknowledge their experience: Start by acknowledging their loss or experience. If they mention a name, use it. For example:
“I’m so sorry to hear you lost [name] to meningitis five years ago.”
“I’m so sorry to hear you had meningitis when you were a baby.”
Mirror their language and use the same phrasing and terminology back:
Them: ‘My child passed away from meningitis.’
You: ‘I’m sorry to hear your child passed away from meningitis.’
Them: ‘Running the marathon has been so important to me in honouring the memory of [name].’
You: ‘I’m so pleased to hear that running the marathon has been important for you in honouring the memory of [name].’
Give people your full attention when they’re sharing their experiences with you.
Tell the person it’s okay for them to be emotional. Don’t feel you need to bottle up your own emotion either – emotions help us feel heard and human.
Looking after yourself
After a difficult conversation, it’s really important to prioritise your own well-being. These interactions can be emotionally draining, and taking time to debrief and recharge is crucial.
Here are some ways to look after yourself once these conversations have ended:
Take a break: Step away from the conversation or situation as soon as you can. Giving yourself immediate space is crucial for processing.
Engage in calming activities: Find something that helps you settle your mind. This could be going for a walk, enjoying a cup of tea, reading a chapter of a book, listening to music, or anything else that brings you a sense of calm.
Recognise your limits: Pay close attention to how you’re feeling. If you sense you’re becoming overwhelmed, it’s absolutely okay to take a longer break or end your participation early. Prioritising your well-being is always the right decision.
Debrief and share: Connect with your Meningitis Research Foundation contact when you have a moment. Sharing your experiences can be incredibly helpful for processing emotions and gaining perspective.
Our Support Service team are available for all Ambassadors to use, so please seek help whenever you need it. We understand that you have already been through so much and that talking to others about their experiences will be emotionally challenging. If it ever gets too much, please let us support you in the role. We are here so that you don’t have to face meningitis alone.